​Can I tell you a secret? 

I am damaged goods.
So much so that I have no self esteem.
I understand that lacking a strong support system will do that to you.

The real secret is that I feel empty and destroyed.
My spirit was broken by the hands of another.
I wasn’t paying attention.
And now I want to be fxcked until the pain in my chest subsides.
I want to be fxcked until the tears of despair transform into tears of pleasure.
I want to be fxcked until it’s no longer my pleasure being pleased,  it is my pleasure pleasing you.

Fxcked until 6 years of heartache becomes
A short story compiled of life lessons.
Fxck me until I remember who I used to be.

I should want more than a good fxck.
More comes with more children and more heartache.  More finger pointing.
More drama.
More strings.
Right now
I am desperately seeking to fly away.